Do I really want a Husband?

“The Parable of the Ten Virgins”

(Matthew 25:1-13, Preaching: Pastor Stephen Magee, August 10, 2008)

Matthew 25:1-13 "Then the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went to meet the bridegroom. ² Five of them were foolish, and five were wise. ³ For when the foolish took their lamps, they took no oil with them, ⁴ but the wise took flasks of oil with their lamps. ⁵ As the bridegroom was delayed, they all became drowsy and slept. ⁶ But at midnight there was a cry, 'Here is the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.' ⁷ Then all those virgins rose and trimmed their lamps. ⁸ And the foolish said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.' ⁹ But the wise answered, saying, 'Since there will not be enough for us and for you, go rather to the dealers and buy for yourselves.' ¹⁰ And while they were going to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the marriage feast, and the door was shut. ¹¹ Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, 'Lord, lord, open to us.' ¹² But he answered, 'Truly, I say to you, I do not know you.' ¹³ Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour.

Introduction – Marriage rituals

The remaining parables in Matthew’s gospel show the Lord as a Master and a King. In this one He is a bridegroom. The voice of a bride and a groom is a good thing in the Scriptures. If the prophets want to write about bad times, one of the things they talk about it is those voices being taken away. When they speak about the good life coming back they talk about the bride and groom being heard again. These are supposed to be voices of joy. When we read about marriage rituals in the Old and New Testaments, we try to explain them as well as we can. The story of Ruth’s courtship or the wedding where Jesus turned the water into wine give glimpses into worlds that we really don’t understand, and into an institution that we are not sure is all that happy at present.

There is no specific wedding ceremony given for us to follow in the Bible, but the concept and meaning of marriage are central to the plan of God. Listen to these words about the coming resurrection life from Isaiah 62:1-5:

For Zion's sake I will not keep silent, and for Jerusalem's sake I will not be quiet, until her righteousness goes forth as brightness, and her salvation as a burning torch. 2 The nations shall see your righteousness, and all the kings your glory, and you shall be called by a new name that the mouth of the LORD will give. 3 You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the LORD, and a royal diadem in the hand of your God. 4 You shall no more be termed Forsaken, and your land shall no more be termed Desolate, but you shall be called My Delight Is in Her, and your land Married; for the LORD delights in you, and your land shall be married. 5 For as a young man marries a young woman, so shall your sons marry you, and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you.

In the New Testament we read in Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” The Lord wants us to think of Jesus Christ as our Husband who loves His bride sacrificially and passionately. What will the resurrection be like? It will be like everything that you ever wanted love to be.

Ten virgins went out to meet the Bridegroom (1)

The passage immediately before this is about wise and faithful servants of God at the end of the current age. We need to be aware of the time period in view here, since Matthew 25:1 refers to something that “will” take place “then.” When is “then?” It is the time of the coming of the completed resurrection temple at the return of the Lord. It is a good thing for us to think about what the kingdom of heaven will be like then, and this is a story that gives us something to consider, a story of a groom who is expected, and ten virgins who go out with torches to meet him.

Somehow this relates to particular customs that are not well understood by commentators today and apparently not essential to the point here. It seems possible that there was to be a procession of a bridegroom accompanied by friends of the bride who were to lead him to the home where the bride and the guests were waiting. Everything was ready to go, but there was no groom. He was not there. He was coming from some other place.

Five and five (2-4)

These ten ladies are immediately noted as being either foolish or wise. The foolish ones have assumed that the groom was surely coming very soon according to their schedule, so they did not bring extra oil with them for their lamps. The wise took the precaution of bringing more oil in case the groom was delayed in coming. There were five foolish virgins and five wise virgins all waiting for one groom who was delayed. The ones who brought oil recognized that the groom was keeping his own good schedule. The rest expected the groom to keep their schedule.

Oil is central to this story, and we are not told what the oil stands for. It could be that we are not supposed to force it to stand for anything. It is just a detail in the story that does not specifically identify the spirit, or being spiritually alive. To be specific like that would just be guessing. What we can say is that having the extra oil means taking Jesus at His Word about the timing of His return. He said that we need to be ready, and that He would come at a time when He was not expected. Those who believe Him about that recognize that He might return later than everyone thinks, so they want to be prepared for that possibility. Others are presumptuous and are so sure that His return will be swift that they do not prepare for a wait that may be much longer than what everyone supposes. This is the best way to understand the meaning of the extra flasks of oil, rather than forcing this detail into some allegory.

“Here is the Bridegroom!” (5-7)

The bridegroom in the story did not come right away, and all the virgins fell asleep. Again we want to resist the temptation to analyze the parable too closely. There is no criticism necessarily in what they did. They were all drowsy. They all fell asleep. The only difference between the two groups is the matter of preparedness for a longer than expected waiting period before the arrival of the groom.

Finally at midnight, a very late time to have a wedding, the cry is heard everywhere, “Here is the bridegroom!” This is unmistakably similar to what Christ has been saying in Matthew’s gospel about His own return. These words are like the sound of the trumpet that calls everyone together for the wedding assembly. This is a very exciting moment. Though we have been warned that it will definitely happen, we would be shocked if right now were the midnight of God’s timing. Are you willing to think of the Lord as your loving husband? Are you ready for the groom’s arrival?

The marriage feast (8-12)

We know that some of those friends of the bride were not ready. They did not have the oil to go out into the darkness and to meet the approaching groom. They wanted to get oil from the others, but there would not have been enough for everyone. They had to go out at midnight to buy oil, but there was no time to make up for their lack of preparation. The groom arrived. Those who were ready lead him in procession to the feast, and the door was shut.

I know that all of this may seem silly to you. The story, like most parables, is not in the Bible as a cultural lesson or as literature. You need to feel the weight of it, the sadness of the door closing with any of us still on the wrong side of it, unprepared for His arrival. The imagery in this parable is about a marriage feast for you. Are you willing to be loved by a man who gave His life for you? The Lord’s love is the best and strongest love ever known. The God who died for your sins wants to be a husband to you. Do not be offended by Him, or put off by the intimacy of His proposal. He is the lover of your soul, your protector, your provider, and He will be your eternal companion.

Today the door is wide open for those who love the groom’s appearing, who love the resurrection marriage feast, and who want to be included in the number of those who belong to Christ. Just as there came a day when God shut the door to Noah’s ark, there will come a day when a person’s entreaties to the Lord will be too late. It is time to believe in the resurrection, not only of Jesus, but of the whole resurrection age that is coming. It is time to meditate upon Him and what that resurrection wedding will be like so that you will be prepared and useful, both in this life, and in the life to come. It is time to do whatever the Lord tells you to do now, so that you will never hear those horrible words, “I do not know you.”

Today is no time for you to reject Jesus. It is no time for you to stop serving Him and His people. When the Lord returns, the time for preparedness and for investing earth’s resources in heavenly treasures will be over. If you want this husband, remember these three things. 1. Live for the Lord and His return. 2. Think about the Lord and His return. 3. Talk about the Lord and His return; but talk to Him about these things more than you talk to anyone else about it. There is a code of silence that has swept across our region which insists that it is inappropriate to talk about knowing Jesus. It sounds too private. I understand that. You will never be able to break that code of silence until you develop the habit of talking to God first about the return of His Son and the coming resurrection age.

Are you ready for the resurrection? (13)

This is a story with a point, and the point is given to us in verse 13. It has to do with the fact that we do not know the day or the hour. You need to know the bridegroom, and you need to be looking for Him and be ready for Him. This groom is a great man. He is the only one in this age who has a resurrection body already. It may seem that two thousand years is an awfully long period of engagement, but God and His heavenly company will announce when the marriage is happening. Jesus died for His bride, and He will not be stopped from having the one for whom He shed His blood. He is coming. Any delay that we may feel must have a good purpose.

This life is a pilgrimage that ends in a marriage. It is not a short journey. There are many obstacles. You will face weariness, sickness, opposition, and even death. You have to keep on going. You have to stretch forward. You do not get to the marriage part any faster or better by stopping the pilgrimage or by running away from God. The Lord who died for you has not forgotten you. You do not know the day or the hour of His coming, but you do know the fact that He is going to be at His own wedding. This current age has a midnight, and then a wedding day will come. May you have the oil of readiness for that new day when the Lord will rejoice over His bride with joyful songs.

Questions for meditation and discussion:

1. In what ways were the ten virgins the same? In what way were they different?

2. What happened to the bridegroom in the parable and how did the virgins react to that?

3. Why were the virgins who had the oil unwilling to share with those who did not have oil?

4. What does it mean that the Lord is a husband for the church, and why are we sometimes uncomfortable about that thought?